Fire Pits And The Childfree Life

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Recently, my BF and I have finally been able to start landscaping our property. The first order of business what to build a firepit and a red-woodchip path leading to it. The fire pit is stone, rising about two feet off the ground and has a two-food diameter. Built into the fire ring is a grill grate on hinges. The border of the fire ring, connecting it to the brick circle wall, is a ring of clay which I laid leaves into for a cool visual effect. The path leading to the firepit is a gentle curve that starts at our hot-tub deck. Along the path are ten irregularly-shaped and very shiny quartz stepping-stones with quartz in them. Bordering this path are several tall, black, metal tiki torches.

I don’t want to sound like a braggart, but it’s gorgeous. Most credit for it goes to my boyfriend, but I helped too. It will look even better when we get curved benches to encircle the fire pit.  

We love our new fire pit. We’ve wanted one for years, and now we finally have one. We have fires on it almost nightly and love to cook over it. Last week we cooked BBQ babyback ribs over it. Let me tell you, it was juicy and delicious. On the menu tonight? T-bone steak cooked over our fire.

Yes, this is the life we live. And one we couldn’t have if we had kids. Let me tell you why.

  1. 1.       If we had kids, we wouldn’t have been able to buy our lovely four-bedroom house on a quarter acre lot. We wouldn’t have been able to afford it. Besides, why spend money on things kids will trash anyway?
  2. 2.       Even if we could still afford the property, we wouldn’t have been able to afford the materials to build the fire pit. In all, it cost a few hundred dollars. As we don’t have kids, we can just spend that money on a whim. With kids, not so much.
  3. 3.       We wouldn’t have had the time or energy to build a fire pit or, indeed, do any landscaping at all if we had kids monopolizing our attention.
  4. 4.       Even if we tried to build the pit, kids would just get in the way of meaningfully progress.
  5. 5.       It’s a waste of effort to build beautiful, nice things when kids are around. They’d just ruin it. They’d carve up the drying clay, they’d knock over or smash stones, they’d tear down the lighting fixtures, and they’d throw the woodchips everywhere.
  6. 6.       If we had kids, we couldn’t build permanent decorative fixtures in the yard, even if the kids would leave them alone. Kids need space to play, and a large firepit in the middle of the lawn is an obstacle. Children wouldn’t be happy that it was there in their space, or might even manage to hurt themselves on it.
  7. 7.       Fire is a hazard to kids. Let’s face it, kids aren’t always the most clever bunch. They could hurt themselves or others by getting to close to the fire, might try to play with the fire, might burn things that aren’t supposed to be burnt (on purpose or by accident,) and might get tiki torch oil and other flammable materials where they don’t belong.
  8. 8.       A fire pit would do me no good if I didn’t have the time or energy to enjoy it because my life was wasted on kids.
  9. 9.       My boyfriend and I wouldn’t find so much enjoyment hanging around a fire together if all the romance had been sucked out of our relationship by the demands and tedium of child-rearing and all that comes with it.
  10. 10.   If we had kids, it wouldn’t be ribs or steak being cooked over our fire, at least not nearly as often. Wouldn’t be able to afford it. Hot dogs on a stick are OK, but I wouldn’t want them all the time.

Being childfree isn’t about what I don’t have, kids. It’s about what I DO have because I don’t have kids. Every time I look at my life, I am reminded of how great I have it, and how much I would lose if there were kids involved. My fire pit is just one example out of far too many to list. Honestly, I can’t imagine trading my happy life for the misery motherhood would be. I see no reason to just throw my life away, so I don’t.

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Posted on 2013/07/14, in childfree. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. No pics? Sounds gorgeous though. I would love to have a fire pit some day or even a yard. As it is, we’re in an apartment. On the upside, I get to enjoy having the door to the balcony open almost all the time. I only shut it when it rains. If I had kids I’d probably have to keep it locked so they wouldn’t flip over the side of it. The only drawback is that our balcony overlooks a playground which is annoying a fair deal of the time. But at least the shouting and shrieking isn’t going on inside my home.

    • Julie Was Here

      No pics because there’s a bit more I want to do first. Need benches. And plants.

      The balcony sounds lovely. I’ve always wanted one. You’re right that have g kids would probably prevent you from enjoying it.

      I don’t have a balcony, exactly, but I do have a high deck that’s almost a story off the ground, with access by slugging glass doors in the kitchen and master bedroom.

      • Right on.

        It is nice. We had a choice between two apartments and I’m glad I insisted on this one with the balcony even though it’s an extra floor up. We’re on the top floor too so the fresh air and lack of anyone stomping above us or past the door is nice too.

        That sounds cool too.

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